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First, I am a feminist; I claim to do this for myself, not my long-term male partner, or anyone before him, or any societal expectation.
Second, the only times I ever got Brazilian waxes, removing almost all pubic hair, were during the year and a half in college when I was deliberately celibate and only my hands, my vibrator, and my full-length mirror saw my crotch. Yet here I am, month in and month out, dropping my pants for a stranger, letting her slide hot, green, organic wax along my vulva, around my labia, and across my lower abdomen with a thick, pale wooden popsicle stick just so I can feel “clean.” How can I subject a part of my body with such a complicated narrative to this hedonistic ritual and still call myself a feminist?
Not to say that there’s anything wrong with a woman wanting to wear makeup or shave, wax if she wants to.
It’s problematic when woman feel like they to.” * * * A friend of mine told me about renowned New York City-based sex educator and entrepreneur Carlin Ross, who along with veteran artist, author and sex educator Betty Dodson, runs Dodson’s Bodysex Workshops.
“I think there’s a perception that certain manifestations of patriarchy, like the need for women to remove body hair, wear makeup, etc., dissipates if there isn’t a man in the picture,” Hoffman wrote.
“But the truth is that these beliefs are so internalized that they’re there regardless.
So she created an alternative – natural wax, safe for the most sensitive skin; affordable prices leveraged by faster services; and uniformly trained technicians in a clean, welcoming, precise environment designed for hair removal only.Her movements punctuated the way our exchange became a montage of her memory and thoughts: a conversation she had among female and male friends in graduate school where the men – uninvited – disclosed their female pubic hair preferences; a women’s studies class she took in college that examined hierarchy as a giant spider web; how she’s heard people say waxing is something only white people worry about; how she feels that women of color, as one herself, have a different view on body image and grooming; and how those of us who identify as women aren’t having enough conversations and discussions with one another across our various social identities.And it seems, if this is our discussion around vulva grooming, isn’t it ushering us toward something deeper, so to speak? * * * For the past four years, I have been a dedicated Uni K Wax Center devotee.A few bikini waxes ago, I pulled off my pants and underwear, loosely folded them into a pile atop my shoes, hoisted myself onto the waxing table and briskly flopped my legs into a diamond, my feet touching sole to sole.While waiting for the esthetician to return with a cylinder of green wax and conduct my regular procedure – a “women’s deep bikini with top,” which clears the underwear lines and keeps some bush around the labia – I had a montage of thoughts.